NEW WORDS

Since Michael Richards blew up before our eyes, there have been apologies, press conferences, and lawyers, preachers and other chattering skulls weighing in on the subject. The two men (frankly, I am too lazy to look up their names) who were the targets of the tirade have retained Gloria Allred (frankly, I don't need to know their names, just that the contemptible Gloria Allredis their lawyer) to represent them, and have said that they want an apology and remuneration, as dictated by an arbitrator. When asked by Sean Hannity to put a price on the harm caused by Richards, and his use of the N-Word, the target said that was for the judge to decide. When asked what his response would be if the judge deemed that there was no monetary damage, the man said that he would continue to fight because he was so harmed by Richards' words. What a dick. (However, if Michael Richards were, say, the senior senator from West Virginia, he might have gotten a pass.)

Now frankly, if the two men had said nothing, and gotten up to leave, they would have been mere footnotes to history. However, they have chosen to inject themselves into the public eye; and, as such, deserve nothing. (As an aside, if Malachi Ritscher had just screamed "Nigger!" as he was striking the match, then somebody might have noticed his sad and futile stunt sooner.)

Now, I do not believe that we should censor people such as comedians and the press (unless national security is involved). And the use of certain words does not imply that one is a racist (unless the speaker uses those words while a cross burns, or a rope dangles from a tree).

As far as I am concerned, the so-called N-Word is so overused as to have lost its pejorative meaning. The use of the N-Word is not unlike the use of "fuck". It is crude, and people should know that it is an inappropriate declaration, but it is still widely used (and tolerated); and, it should not be eliminated from the vernacular. "Gay" has lost its original meaning, as has "queer". Indeed, gays proudly use the term "queer" to describe themselves and their lifestyle.

However, in the interest of sensitivity, all potentially offensive terms will be differently represented. For instance, instead of the N-Word, you will see N*****. Instead of the S-Word, you will see S***. The Irish will be known as M**** and the Guineas will be known as W*** or D*****. Southerners will be known as C******* or R*******. Indians will be known as C***** or S****** (depending upon their place of origin); and, going forward, the (offensive) Washington Redskins Football Team will be known simply as the Redskins.*

*Since "Washington" is the far more offensive part of the name.