Thursday, April 05, 2012


Our Nation's Most Pressing Problem
President Barack Hussein Obama, who remains a fervent non-Muslim, has weighed in on the nation's most pressing problem.

Not the fiasco that is ObamaCare.

Not spiking gasoline prices.

Not the threat to peace in the Middle East.

Not childhood obesity.

Not whether Sandra Fluke was called a "slut"; or, that if he had a son, he'd look like Trayvon Martin.

Nope, BHO has decided to tell a private golf club that they should admit women as members.  

Coming off a week where he threatened the Supreme Court with his comments about the individual mandate, he has weighed in on the Augusta National policy that prohibits women from being members of the club.  

Oh, sure, a woman can play a round of golf at Augusta, she just can't play without an invitation from a member.  Just like every other country club in America.

But, Obama needs the vote of women, especially those that don't belong to country clubs.  And, Obama knows golf, having played more than 90 times in his just over three years in office.  (In fact, it might be one of the only things that BHO is good at, given his 17 handicap.)

And, since this type of pronouncement makes for good press (when everything else you say makes you look like a fucking idiot), President Obama charges right into the fray.

Frankly, The Lifeguard couldn't care less about the issue.  Golf on television is stupid.  It's boring.  It's painful.  It's stupid.  (Wait!  The Lifeguard just said that.)    

Sure, The Lifeguard loves golf.  (Just the other night, Nurse Dagmar was admiring The Lifeguard's driver's stiff shaft and his dimpled balls.)  And, The Lifeguard would give just about anything to play a round at Augusta.  However, it's just not something that the president should be involved with.  (Especially if he ever wants to play at Augusta National.)  If women are so exercised about membership in a club that they will never be members of, then let them scream about it.  But, the president should simply shut the fuck up.

[Note:  If anyone wants to invite The Lifeguard to play Augusta, please feel free to contact me.  Or, if the 2010 DePauw University women's golf team would like to play around with The Lifeguard, they should definitely call.]

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