HFWTFMF?!?

Speedos!

Another installment of the most anticipated political and social commentary in the world.  The world.

• President Barack Hussein Obama (who, like Auntie Zeituni, is a Kenyan living in public housing) gave his "steak dinner" speech.  What a douche.
• The Global Attitudes Project did a survey on world opinion of President Obama, and found that the world has "cooled" on the president.  (At least something he's done has involved "cooling."  That should take care of the level of the oceans, too.)
• The Oklahoma City Thunder beat the Miami Heat to go up 1-0 in the NBA Championships.  Does anyone care?  Could there be two more uninteresting teams in the NBA?  (Actually, there are 30 uninteresting teams in the NBA.)
• Alex Rodriguez tied Lou Gehrig for the most grand slams in MLB history.  His 23d grand slam gave him 639 home runs, bringing him within 21 taters of Willie Mays.  He is 5th on the all-time home run list.
• Russia and Poland drew 1-1 in the Euro 2012 Championship (in Warsaw), following a second half goal by the Polish captain, Jakub Blaszczykowski.  All things considered, this was a far better outcome than the last time Poland and Russia met up in Poland.
• Game 1 of the NBA finals involved teams scoring 197 more points than the Russia v. Poland match.  That still wasn't enough to keep The Lifeguard's attention.
• Attorney General Eric Holder refuses to pony up "Fast and Furious" documents, and has clearly been lying to Congress.  And yet, few have the balls to call for his resignation.  The government is trying to send Roger Clemens to jail for lying to Congress, and AG Holder gets a pass.

That's all for now.  The Lifeguard has to get to taikonaut training.

Today, we're practicing re-entries.