Convention Redux

The Speech Of His Life

The Lifeguard offers his thoughts on the Mitt Romney speech.  You know, because you want to know what The Lifeguard is thinking right about now.

• The RNC video that is going to precede his acceptance speech is so saccharine-sweet, it’s going to make The Lifeguard a diabetic.
• Clint Eastwood is going to be the mystery speaker.  How awesome is that?  But, he made a joke about The Oprah crying.  Ten-to-one, that comment gets some Democrat operative riled up, talking about the Republican “War on Women.”
• The remarks about the Afghanistan morass were exceptional, as was the line about “Mr. Romney not being able to do that to himself.”
• Eastwood would have been better served to have simply said, “The first thing we do is kill all of the lawyers.”  (Of course, both The Lifeguard and Romney are lawyers, so maybe not all of the lawyers.)
• Hell, let’s get Clint Eastwood for President.  “Politicians are employees of ours.”  Well said, Clint.  Well said.  Also, the empty chair was brilliant.  As if to say, "President Obama is not at the helm of this ship that is America.  (And, sure enough, President Obama leaves the Big Boy Chair as empty as his suit.)
• The saddest part is that Vice President Joe Biden is the intellect of the Democrat party.
• The Lifeguard would sooner have Dirty Harry than Dirty Barry.
• Senator Marco Rubio (R-FL) is…on…fire.  Very nice reference to the hopes and dreams of Cubans living in oppression in their island paradise.
• Senator Rubio is inspiring, but The Lifeguard would have preferred to have Governor Christie doing the introduction.
• Governor Romney is tanned, rested, and…well, mostly ready.
• He’s speaking too slowly.  And, I am getting a distinct John “My Father Was a Mill Worker” Edwards vibe.  Who writes this crap?  The Lifeguard is surprised that he didn’t say that he was Mexican.
• Boring.
• Sure, he poked fun at BHO; but, he doesn’t have the personality to deliver many of the lines that would, otherwise, garner huge applause.  And, because of the pace of his speech, the crowd didn’t always know when to applaud; or, for how long.
• The best line:  “The best feeling you had about BHO was the day you voted for him.”  (The Lifeguard would have liked to have heard Romney say, “Obama says I like to fire people.  Well, when, like the president, they aren’t doing their jobs, they deserve to be fired.”)
• He stumbles on a few words.  More than you should stumble over, when giving the biggest speech of your life.  The most important speech in your life.
• Governor Chris Christie is, as The Lifeguard writes this, kicking himself for not running for president.
• The Lifeguard doesn't care about "likability."  Sometimes, you just don't like your president (or your boss); but, you know that they are the right man (or woman) for the job because of their intelligence, experience, and their character.  That is what gives Governor Romney a leg up on the Preezy of the Heezy, not the fact that he'd be a swell guy to have a cold beer (or some other decaffeinated beverage) with on a hot, humid day.
• Romney is killing it, now.  (Almost thirty minutes into this speech.) 
• It’s over.  Thankfully.  (About two minutes after he started to hit his stride.)

More thoughts later.

Adios!