The Lifeguard is not a racist.

Huh?

In the wake of an awful political advertisement saying that he's got the back of the black community, Obamapologist Angela Rye upped the ante in the politics of race by coming out with the absolutely absurd statement that Obama's difficulties in office come because he is black.  (Aside from the fact that the commercial and the statements are just plain idiotic, a white person could never run that ad, or make that statement, without being called the worst sort of names.)

Angela Rye, the executive director of the Congressional Black Caucus made this bugfuck crazy statement on C-SPAN's Q&A, on June 10th, 2012.  (To her defence, she made the statement on C-SPAN's Q&A, so we know that absolutely no one heard it.)  She went on to add that when critics of President Barack Hussein Obama (who remains a devoutly non-Muslim American) call him "cool", they are expressing racist sentiments.

Whew!

Just when The Lifeguard thought that he might be a racist, Angela Rye comes along and makes one of the most insane comments ever.  Ever.

And, for the record, The Lifeguard never thought of President Obama as cool.

Never.

Like Father, Like Son...

Colonel Muammar Gaddafi (who is a Muslim) and President Barack Hussein Obama (who is not) are seen together, sharing stories about life, love and their mutual friend, The Honourable Minister Louis Farrakhan.

In this context, it is easy to see why President Obama took the easy route and let the French, the United Kingdom, and the rest of the world take action against the Libyan leader, who is putting down--brutally--the uprising by his people. In fact, President Obama was dragged, kicking and screaming (figuratively speaking, of course) into this morass, a day late and $500 million short.

Indeed, were it not for Secretary of State, Hillary Clinton (who, apparently, has the balls in this administration), the United States would still be on the sidelines. Not only did she urge action in this matter, she has been on the vanguard, the public face of America's response to Gaddafi's insolence.

But, to his defence, President Obama has had other things on his mind, like his Final Four picks (both men and women), a trip to Brazil, and lunch. In fact, one could make several comparisons.

The first, to the Roman Emperor, Nero, who fiddled while Rome burned. Similarly, President Obama seems to be dedicated to avoiding any action that might jeapordise his chances at re-election. Said Obama, "The American public is so fucking stupid, they will have forgotten everything by the next news cycle, so all I have to do is lay low." (Well, he didn't really say that; but, it seems to be a fair assessment of his strategy these days.)

The second, and more telling comparison, is to President George W. Bush and his administration. For eight years, we were shelled with accusations that President Bush was just a figurehead, who did nothing while letting his much smarter vice president carry the heavy load. (Of course, this ignores all that President Bush did do, but that is another post for another day.)

In this administration, Obama does nothing, Vice President Joe Biden opens Amtrak stations, and Secretary Clinton does the heavy lifting.

If anyone is listening to The Lifeguard, he offers Secretary Clinton the following suggestions to solving the Libyan problem.

First, work closely with the French and British to find out Colonel Gaddafi's whereabouts, then kill him, either with assets on the ground or with air strikes. (Maybe the Colonel and one of his sons will be together, and the sniper could get a "Quigley.") Every statement should begin and end with the admonition to Gaddafi, "We are coming to get you."

Second, get some reasonable intelligence about the strength of the rebel forces. It seems that this is all happening in a vacuum, and that the United States doesn't seem to know what is going on in country. This dude, Gaddafi, is bugfuck crazy, and has resorted to terrorism in the past. He has no qualms about bombing his own people, or about terrorising the world. (The Lifeguard was in that disco, in Berlin, just days before it was bombed in April, 1986.)

Finally, protect the oil fields in Libya. While this isn't our primary goal, it is in the top two. Gaddafi has the means (and the desperation) to pull a Saddam, and that is not good for anyone, anywhere in the world. If there is going to be blood shed, we might as well get a few quarts of 10W30 out of it.

In the meantime, The Lifeguard is watching the news reports and monitoring the situation. President Obama is having a late breakfast.

Kinda makes me wish I were French...

The Chickens Come Home to Roost

President Barack Hussein Obama (who is not a Muslim) gave British Prime Minister Gordon Brown some DVDs that wouldn't play, and took many opportunities to shit on our oldest--and best--ally. Now, we find out that the PM was working, behind the scenes, to see that Pan Am Flight 103 bomber, Abdulbaset al-Megrahi's release--on humanitarian grounds--was not hampered.

To make matters worse, President Obama (who is still not a Muslim) had no objections to al-Megrahi being freed on humanitarian grounds.

It is enough to make The Lifeguard scream, I tell you.

This murdering son-of-a-bitch participated in the deaths of 270 innocents, then went home to a hero's welcome after being freed because he had terminal cancer. Because someone thought it was the humane thing to do.

As noted previously, if it was a hero's welcome he was going to get, the US Air Force should have provided the fireworks. Or, perhaps today, a little present, delivered on the nose of a cruise missile.

Effin' A, Cotton. Effin' A.

The French Have Balls.
Four words that The Lifeguard thought he'd never utter. But, it's true. And, French president, Nicolas Sarkozy, showed them by ordering the French Navy to storm a yacht seized by hostis humani generis--enemies of the human race. The French did, killing one hostage--Florent Lemacon, the yacht's owner--in the process; but, freeing the other folks on the vessel (including Lemacon's son).

Sarkozy gave the order to attack at 1530HRS; and, thirty seconds later, the French were on the S/V Tanit, kicking ass and taking names.

Sadly, the French didn't kill every last pirate. But, there is hope, because the French continue to take the lead role in eradicating high seas piracy.

Who'd have thought that the French president would order swift action, while the American president lets an American merchant sailor languish in a lifeboat with Somali pirates, while the FBI (the motherhumping FBI) handles the negotiations.

Shit, if The Lifeguard were in charge, the negotiations would go like this:

Lifeguard: "Surrender now, or we will board the lifeboat and kill you all."

Skinny: "We want $2M."

Lifeguard: "Go fuck yourself. You have thirty seconds."

Skinny: "We are serious."

Lifeguard: "Oh, and we will hunt your families down and kill them all, if Captain Phillips is harmed."

Skinny: "We surrender. "

Lifeguard: [Taking Phillips aboard the Navy SEALS' RIB] "Thank you."

Lifeguard: "Sink the boat, light up their village."

Skinny: "But you promised...."

At this point, fifteen BGM-109 Tomahawk cruise missiles leave the USS Bainbridge, bound for the Somali shitholes that harbour the pirates. At the same time, the pirates are bound and carried aboard the Bainbridge, where they are tried, convicted and hanged as the Tomahawks hit their targets. Hoo-Rah!