Sunday, December 23, 2007
In a recent revelation, it was learned that the grisly deaths of Nicole Brown Simpson and Ronald Goldman were not hits by Colombian drug lords; but, rather, an honour killing by a convert to the so-called "Religion of Peace."
That's his story, and he's sticking to it. Or, it should be his story.
It seems that the religion, whose fanatics we are battling in The War Against Terror, love to mistreat women, because they are...well...women. (In a side note, former President Clinton is trying to prove that someone...anyone...banged Hillary! Then, he could have her killed, to preserve the honour of the only elected US President to be impeached. After all, he feels right at home in the Muslim world, so moving to Dubai would be A-OK with him.)
If your daughter goes out without her hijab, strangle her. If your son fucks a girl from another tribe, someone gets to gang-rape his sister. Leave your husband because he beats the shit out of you, kill her for causing shame. After all, we need to protect the honour of the family. Strangely, though, fucking a goat (or a camel)--or blowing yourself to bits--doesn't seem to cause all that many problems for you or your family.
Strangely, however, there are folks that don't have a problem with this, mainly because they don't want to impose their morality on anyone. They don't want a backwards-thinking religion to feel like there is anything wrong with wanting to mistreat Christians and Jews, gang-rape or stone women, or live in the ninth century.
So, if OJ wants to get right with Allah, then he should say that he converted to Islam. Everyone would accept that. Jail-house conversion, and all. Then, he could come out with the truth. He killed Nicole because she was with Ron, on her porch, without her hijab. And, since she was uncovered, and he was a Jew, the killing gets the imprimatur of the Mullahs.
My advice for MOJhammed: Pack your shit--including your sticks--and move to Tehran. You would be a fucking god. They might even get your Heisman Trophy back.