THE LIFEGUARD HAS BEEN "UNFRIENDED"...
by his "unfriend."
It's funny, but the "unfriending" happened just days before "unfriend" became the 2009 Word of the Year. (In the eyes, at least, of the Oxford Dictionary.) A week or so before Thanksgiving. And, it was so easy. One minute, friends. The next, no evidence that the friendship ever existed. (Except, of course, for those nude photographs.)
It kind of hurt. The Lifeguard, after all, is a friend to all...except to those who "unfriend" him.
The Lifeguard just hopes that no one else "unfriends" him. (At least not today.)