Sunday, November 02, 2008

Obama's OUI

We Needed To Know...
That President George W. Bush had been pinched for an DUI. Getting the news just a few days before the 2000 election was, in no way, meant to keep people from voting for then-candidate Bush. And, 'though some thought it was a dirty trick, it was reported by everyone.

From my perspective, it didn't make a difference to me, because I was already a Bush supporter. (I am still talking about the President.) In fact, I thought that the candidate should have released the news ages earlier, to blunt the possibility that the possibly damaging revelation could derail his campaign.

When the news broke (due to no fault of the mainstream media), I thought that it made the candidate more electable for the simple reason that nearly everyone has driven after having had too much to drink.

That is to say, anyone who has ever raised a glass at a party (or bar), then driven home, could have found themselves in the same situation as then-citizen Bush. The fact that he got caught is the old "There but for the grace of God go I" moment.

Now, just days before the 2008 election, we learn that Senator Obama's aunt, Zeituni Onyango is pulling off the trifecta: She is 1) living illegally in the United States, 2) in public housing, 3) employed by the Boston Housing Authority.

Following the same logic as with Candidate Bush before, I find that this revelation makes the Illinois Senator more electable. I mean, which of us doesn't have an "Auntie Zeituni" who is an illegal alien, in public housing, working for the Boston Housing Authority?

Hell, I do. And my Auntie Zeituni is a "...proud woman..." who really doesn't want to admit that she is related to The Lifeguard (until after the election). I love my Auntie, even though she is an illegal alien.

Oh, wait. I don't have an Auntie Zeituni (although I once drove home from a bar, completely and totally shitfaced).

And, for the record, I remarked ages ago that Hillary! should have been delving into Obama's family tree. She could have found a treasure trove of information that might have put her on the November 4th ballot. But....

The final question? If Senator Obama lets his proud auntie live in a council flat, what do you think he's going to do for (or to) you?

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