I AM A FUCKING GENIUS...


In the event that people think that The Lifeguard is some sort of Neanderthal (which, frankly, I take as a compliment), check this shit out:

On December 19th, I noted that a vote for Hillary! was a vote for energy independence (because liposuctioning her ass-fat would create more oil than the Prudhoe Bay find of 1968).

Saturday, Hillary! proclaimed that "...electing her President will cut the price of oil."

She went on to say something about alternative fuels (bio diesel made from her ass-fat?) and a reduction of America's dependence on foreign oil.

Score one more for The Lifeguard.